Why Crochet?

I learned how to crochet last year after years of trying. I love to do all crafts, knitting, cross stitch, embroidery, beaded flowers, oil painting, scrapbooking, paper crafts, etc. I've tried them all. I just could not figure out crochet. My best friend Stacy showed me when I visited her on vacation. This was 12 baby blankets, hats and many other project ago. She was so patient and kind to show me. I quickly fell in love with it. 

I was pregnant at the time and having a stressful pregnancy. We were in the middle of a house remodel and living out of boxes. I had a few complications with my pregnancy and had contractions starting at week 20 so really had to take it easy. I also had pregnancy induced carpel tunnel. Crochet helped me escape the chaos around me and focus on creating something. And it didn't effect my wrists at all. I could crochet for hours with not pain afterwards. The last month of pregnancy we moved back in our house and had to get it set up for the baby with limited movement from me. Very stressful. I would crochet as much as I could. It helped calm me down. When the baby was born we used one of the blanked I made her in her newborn pictures. It brings pure excitement every time I see the picture. I made that for her with love!! 

With my first pregnancy I had postpartum depression so I was ready just incase it happened this time. However what I wasn't prepared for was the depression PLUS anxiety. It was brutal. There were days I couldn't get out of bed. And my poor newborn daughter was having issues. She cried for 4 months straight. If she wasn't eating she would cry until she fell asleep. She didn't want to be held even.  We went to the pediatrician many times for it. We were told it was "normal" and some babies just cry. I couldn't accept that answer. My mother instincts told me it was something else. She ended up being tongue tied and lip tied. We also took her and had myofascial release on her whole body. After the first treatment she was a new baby. It's amazing how strong mother instincts are. During all this stress I always turned to crochet. It was the most relaxing thing ever. 

I could sit and forget everything that was going on and relax. I started medicine and continued counseling and am recovering from PPD. Every nap time and the evenings are dedicated to crochet. I worked on a round ruffle blanket for over a month. This was going to be a special present for my daughter. It turned out great however it was not perfect. This has been a HUGE life lesson for me as well. As a perfectionist I have to have it prefect before I will accept that it's finished. I will take things apart and redo as many times until it's ok by my standards. I was so proud of this blanket, even with the mistakes I noticed, I sent a photo to the pattern designed. It was featured on her blog and has now been pinned on Pinterest. I can not believe it! I felt proud and happy for the first time in a long time. Even without it being "perfect." 

Crochet has also helped with my OCD. I love to count everything i.e: number of steps in my house, ceiling tiles at the doctor, how many breathes people take a minute .... I have to count!! Crochet is perfect. Every stitch is counted and in between counts there are other counts. This has actually helped my OCD with other things. 

Crochet has now become such a huge part of who I am on my road to recovery.