A little lightheartedness during this time helps!
As this surgery grows near it's becoming more and more real, this is actually going to happen. This afternoon we have a pre-op appointment with the surgeon and should know more about time and length of the surgery. We have a ton of questions, well atleast I do!
One of our biggest challenges is how much do we tell the kiddos, mostly Reid. Emmy has no idea what is going on since she is only 18 months old. Although she is very helpful in getting Shawn's cane for him and picking things up that he drops. Reid, being 4.5, however is very aware of things going on.
When Shawn's hip really started to deteriorate Reid picked up on this. Daddy couldn't play like he used to and had to sit down a lot to play catch. We were very open with him about how much pain daddy was in. We told him that his hips hurt and that he needs to take breaks a lot. Reid understood and would say "daddy's hips hurt so he can't play right now." I quickly learned how to play catch, wrestle, and fight monsters and bad guys!
Of course this also backfired a little. The other day when I asked Reid to pick up his toys in the playroom of course his "hips hurt" so he couldn't move off the couch. Little toot!!
We told him a few months ago when we had an official date for surgery that daddy would be getting new hips. We explained that they would be putting the new hips inside daddy. He had a lot of questions. Mostly when not so much how. For a few weeks every time Shawn left the house Reid would ask "did you get new hips?" This now has ended. I think he forgot that he was actually getting new ones.
One thing I am struggling with is how much do we include him in this process. Next Wedneday he will be in school during surgery. I am hoping that we can have a normal day as usual with his schedule. To keep things calm. My mom will be staying with Emmy and picking him up from school. We have done this before so it won't be out of the ordinary.
Then do we take him to the hospital to see daddy? I just don't know how he will react to that. When I had Emmy he could have cared less about his new baby sister he was more concerned about my IV booboo. And if I was ok. He's very emotional about us especially when one of us is hurt. Will he be traumatized seeing Shawn in so much pain? In so many ways I want to keep him sheltered from it all and keep this childhood innocence forever!
After the surgery we will have to explain to Reid how much he can touch / not touch Shawn. I know it's going to be so hard not to let him jump on daddy and wrestle. Hopefully he will understand that daddy needs to heal.
I probably shouldn't worry or plan all this right now because a lot of it will be decided when the time comes...in 6 days.
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